Monday, December 5, 2011

Heading Down a Different Road

motorcycle riderJust when you thought you've hunkered down for a long ride on a straight road, you happen upon a detour and all of a sudden your itinerary is laid to waste.

Not that it's all gone to Hell, quite the contrary.

The divorce papers were signed off a couple of months ago, and technically it won't become final for another five months, but I'm already feeling like I'm on a different set of wheels, heading down a different road, with no destination in sight.

Kinda like when you show up every Saturday morning to ride with the same set of guys, to go riding on the same roads, and wind up at the same bar at the end of the day. It's satisfying to a point, and for some guys that kind of predictability offers a sense of security, and from that security, a feeling of purpose.

But for me, I want to feel a sense of the unknown, like I only know what road I'm riding on today, and who knows where I'll be sleeping tonight.

I left her with nearly everything, the house, the furniture, the money, and most of my tools, except for those I need the most to work on my ST. Otherwise, everything I had owned seemed meaningless to me. The more shit I have to carry with me, the more I have to manage. And I don't want that. I only have so much room to carry on my motorcycle, and the less stuff I have, the more free I feel.

All I kept for myself is my motorcycle and my pickup truck, and I only kept the pickup because I knew she'd never use it, and besides, it's my pickup truck.

mattole road
So for now, the road takes me deeper into Southern California, into San Diego, where I grew up as a kid. Maybe I came here because I needed to come full circle, back to the city where my childhood came to an end. Maybe this is where the road begins for me.

I never believed in God.

Instead, I figured the Universe has a way of bringing things together. The Moon with the Earth. The planets with the Sun. The Sun with the Galaxy. The more we think our way through our problems, the more we interfere with that way. If we get in touch with our souls, with what's in our hearts, we allow the Universe to bring ourselves in tune with whatever was meant to be.

For me, right now, it's here in San Diego, with my Honda ST, and with what little possessions I opted to keep.

I spent the first 45 years of my life learning, and those years weren't necessarily mistakes, just learning.

The next 45 years, I'm going to focus on feeling.


  1. I have no doubt you have been down a painful road, from experience the new road you are on will be the most satisfying. Good luck.....I look forward to the biking adventures ahead. There USA freedom that comes from not knowing where you are going......

  2. I understand your situation. Been through one myself. Wished I had a bike when I went through my divorce. Biking will heal, strengthen and clear your thoughts. We are ready to see why is ahead for you. Enjoy the ride.

  3. Best Wishes on the next chapter and the road ahead. Speaking from experience, it won't be easy at times, but there is life after a divorce.

  4. I feel your pain, Steve. We do. Many of us have gone through the Big D, and I don't mean Dallas.

    It won't be easy and it won't be quick but you will make it through this chapter of your life and it will get better,. Guaranteed. You can't see that now, but believe me, brother, it gets better.

    And please give God a chance. He really is there for you in good times and bad. And these can't be good times for you. Pick up a bible and read it; you'll find some comfort there.

    Hang in there. Dan

  5. Hi Steve, we also moved to San Diego 6 months ago. Next year, we plan to ride to Alaska. Let's hook up. You have my face book contact.

    Thuy and Van.

  6. Kind of envy you, I have some times wanted to screw the resonsibilities I have in this world and just take off. Me and my bike, oh and a credit card billed to some one else.


About Steve

A vagabond who hauls a motorcycle around the country in a toy hauler, earning a living as a website developer. Can often be found where there's free Wi-Fi, craft beer, and/or public nudity. (Read more...)